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  • As some of you know, I have wanted to stop managing H-M for some time. It's a tremendous strain on my personal life. I want to set up my own shop. In September, September 15, to be exact, it will be 8 years that Hobby-Machinist has been in existence.

    I have been training VTCNC to run things here. Dabbler is going to learn too. I feel that they are ready to start taking over the operation. I will be here to help in case they need, but I don't think they will. Tony Wells is and will be here also to consult with. I will be doing backups, upgrades, and installing addons. Other than that, I will not be around. I am leaving this place in good operating condition, and financial condition.
    --Nelson
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Ray of Sunshine .... Storm Cloud

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mark_f

H-M Supporter - Gold Member
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#1
After 17 years together, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She said yes and I gave her a 1 1/2 carat engagement ring. We had about 6 great years together after we first met but she had a disease which was terminal. I stood by her for the next 7 years while she laid in a hospital bed most of the time and she almost died twice. A few years ago, a cure was developed for this disease and she was one of the first to try it. She is completely cured now for the last several years and her body has improved to be almost completely back to normal today. I asked her to marry a very short time ago and last week I discovered she is having an affair with a male friend of hers. I told her she had to choose between him or me and she refuses to give him up.(she actually thought she could keep us both).
This brings me to today. I will be closing my shop for the winter as soon as the few small projects in process are finished. I have no desire to machine anything right now. Without her I will be forced into bankruptcy. I see a lawyer next Monday. She will leave me with all the bills as they are in my name. I may not be able to save my shop. I never dreamed anything like this would happen at age 66. I intend to visit here and read what everyone is doing, but I most likely will not be posting anymore.
The part that really hurts is I took care of her and gave her anything she asked for all these years and now I stand to lose everything. I just dont know what to do.
 

.LMS.

Lathe Noob
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#4
Oh man. That sucks.
 

rdean

Active User
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#5
I don't know what to say.
So sad.

Ray
 

Grumpy Gator

Swarf
Former Member
Joined
Sep 18, 2012
Messages
27
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6
#6
Stay strong Brother...You deserve better after all the support and love you gave her...Krama will catch up to her...In the meantime find the meanest lawyer you can and see what options you have...I've seen this type of thing before, a near-death experience changes people in ways they don't even realize...Never forget we are here for you
**Gator**
 

Ulma Doctor

Infinitely Curious
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#7
damn Mark, that is bad news- i'm very sorry to hear it.
she doesn't deserve your devotion or your love.
it's going to be tough but you must move on.
do not give her the satisfaction of showing emotion when dealing with her.
you did the right thing she did not- this is not your problem, this is her problem.
she blew it with an honorable man.
she will get what is coming to her without you having to do anything, soon enough
 
N

Nelson

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#8
wow...I am sorry to hear that. You did right seeing the lawyer. Depending on the laws of your state, you my have some recourse. Either way, the others are right. Karma is tough. And someone who cheats with your significant other will cheat ON her as well. Don't let this stop you from keeping your shop alive and active because if you do, then she wins.
 

jtrain

Active User
Registered
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Oct 3, 2012
Messages
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#9
ouch... i hope it all turns out for the better for you Mark. Stay strong.
 

tweinke

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Joined
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#10
No words can express what I am feeling about your situation. I think you should follow the advise above and see a lawyer then move on from there.
 

dlane

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#11
Stay strong brother, it's a strange world nowadays
 

Z2V

H-M Supporter - Sustaining Member
H-M Platinum Supporter ($50)
Joined
May 10, 2017
Messages
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#12
Hang in there Mark. She obviously forgot how good she had it with you. Like Nels said, her new guy will likely cheat on her down the road. Keep your head held high and move on.
Best Wishes
 

mikey

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#13
After 17 years together, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She said yes and I gave her a 1 1/2 carat engagement ring. We had about 6 great years together after we first met but she had a disease which was terminal. I stood by her for the next 7 years while she laid in a hospital bed most of the time and she almost died twice. A few years ago, a cure was developed for this disease and she was one of the first to try it. She is completely cured now for the last several years and her body has improved to be almost completely back to normal today. I asked her to marry a very short time ago and last week I discovered she is having an affair with a male friend of hers. I told her she had to choose between him or me and she refuses to give him up.(she actually thought she could keep us both).
This brings me to today. I will be closing my shop for the winter as soon as the few small projects in process are finished. I have no desire to machine anything right now. Without her I will be forced into bankruptcy. I see a lawyer next Monday. She will leave me with all the bills as they are in my name. I may not be able to save my shop. I never dreamed anything like this would happen at age 66. I intend to visit here and read what everyone is doing, but I most likely will not be posting anymore.
The part that really hurts is I took care of her and gave her anything she asked for all these years and now I stand to lose everything. I just dont know what to do.
Very sorry to hear about this, Mark. Yeah, see a lawyer and get your ring back - she doesn't deserve it, or you.
 

Groundhog

H-M Supporter - Gold Member
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#14
What a huge bummer. Don't know what to say except I'm so sorry.
Please keep posting when you feel like it. We all value and enjoy your friendship.
 

firestopper

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#15
Wow! unbelievable........not really, happens more than one thinks.
Sorry brother. Stay active in the site to keep from ruminating on the negative.
Peace be with you Mark and that goes for the rest of you.
 

Bill Gruby

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#16
Sorry Mark. I just stumbled into this one. You deserve much better than this.

"Billy G"

PS --- Answer the phone, LOL
 
Last edited:

kvt

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#17
Sorry to hear this Mark, Stay strong and keep your spirts up and do not give up hope,
 

Bill W.

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#18
Stay strong Mark. I know it's easier said than done.
But remember this... Time does heal all wounds.
Bill W.
 

Suzuki4evr

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Messages
333
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361
#19
So sorry to hear this Mark,but don't let this win you.You wil overcome this and she will get what is coming to her. Don't give up and now is the time in my opinion to be in your shop to get your mind of everything that is going on. Good luck Mark,we are all thinking of you and it would be a sad day to loose what you have to offer to this forum.
 

BGHansen

H-M Supporter - Gold Member
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Messages
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#20
After 17 years together, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She said yes and I gave her a 1 1/2 carat engagement ring. We had about 6 great years together after we first met but she had a disease which was terminal. I stood by her for the next 7 years while she laid in a hospital bed most of the time and she almost died twice. A few years ago, a cure was developed for this disease and she was one of the first to try it. She is completely cured now for the last several years and her body has improved to be almost completely back to normal today. I asked her to marry a very short time ago and last week I discovered she is having an affair with a male friend of hers. I told her she had to choose between him or me and she refuses to give him up.(she actually thought she could keep us both).
This brings me to today. I will be closing my shop for the winter as soon as the few small projects in process are finished. I have no desire to machine anything right now. Without her I will be forced into bankruptcy. I see a lawyer next Monday. She will leave me with all the bills as they are in my name. I may not be able to save my shop. I never dreamed anything like this would happen at age 66. I intend to visit here and read what everyone is doing, but I most likely will not be posting anymore.
The part that really hurts is I took care of her and gave her anything she asked for all these years and now I stand to lose everything. I just dont know what to do.
Sorry Mark.
 
Joined
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Messages
3,389
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1,628
#21
Geeze Mark, dear Lord please give my friend strength and the help he needs. Words fail me , please take care of yourself if I can do anything to help I'm here.
 

richl

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#22
Good luck mark, I sincerely hope things work out for you.

Rich
 

wawoodman

himself, himself
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#23
Mark,
That sucks, big time. Stay strong. We’re all behind you.
 

westsailpat

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#24
Sorry for you Mark , I feel for you because I kind of went through this . My first wife thought she could have her boy friend on the side too and she even told me he was going to come over for dinner once a week and we even had a kid . She told me this after she was gone for a month with him , she just showed up one day and told me this and informed me she was taking the kid back . I just closed the door , it felt good . Long story short I gave the ***** enough rope and she hung herself . If I could give you a little pep talk , OK right now you are hurting bad so don't do any thing rash . Get that lawyer , figure things out . What ever you do , don't think she is coming back . Stay strong and get thru this .
 

silence dogood

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#25
Mark, you are a honorable man and very talented to boot. It's too bad that you don't live near by. It isn't much compared to your shop, but I'd let you use mine any time if you lost yours (which I hope to God that you don't).
 

ACHiPo

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#26
Been there. Thoughts are with you.
 

jeff_g1137

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#27
Hi Mark
Sorry i do not know what to say, but my thoughts are with you.
Time & Karma will get you through this.
Do not look back, it is a new day & a new start.
Good luck, we will be here for you.
Jeff
 

core-oil

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#28
Hello Mark, That news totally sucks, The loss of trust and faith is the hardest and sharpest arrow to pierce ones heart, At the moment you are feeling very fragile and hurt, My son went through the same scenario with his wife and without his Mum and I he would have given up altogether, It is really tough If your ex cleans you out of all your machinery and tools , you will be left with another big hole in your life, For heavens sake Don't let it happen, You obviously will (In a worst case scenario) have to find another home.
Take a core group of workshop equipment with you, Your little South Bend Irreplaceable , Even if it lies under your bed , Your hand tools ditto, Maybe your drilling machine as well Maybe some of your friends could be asked to store the rest, The storm cloud will pass .

All the guys on the site are behind you , It is a mark of your standing in this group, That they care so much, Keep strong , Our prayers are here to uplift you in your darkest hour Good Karma for you & for her well least said!
 

NortonDommi

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Messages
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#29
You have my commiserations but on the other hand you are now a member of a very large club and free to do what you want when you want.
Whatever you do, do not let go of your tools, they will be your best friends and your shop whatever and wherever it is your 'safe place'.
May the winds blow good fortune your way.
 

Nelson

Site Founder
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#30
We are asking everyone to help Mark out of this mess by contributing, so his tools are not repossessed at a bankruptcy sale.
If we all pull together, we CAN do it. Mark has been a vital member since 2014.

Please, send him a donation to his PayPal: markfrazier16137@yahoo.com

With your help, he doesn't have to lose his shop.

God bless you.
 
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