I think that’s a very wise thing to do, Eddy. And I have to agree with Projectnut— I too smell the beginnings of dementia and decline in executive function.
We went through many similar situations with my father towards the end and some things are just really hard to get your head around. One that always sticks in my mind had to do with a desk my Dad had in his room at the care place. It was no fancy thing, just a cheapo particle board and photo-finish affair that he used as a bookcase and such. Well one day I went there and there was a loonie-sized patch of the finish scraped away. I asked him what that was all about and he said that he’d found a stain on it so he was scraping it off….
Okay…, um,…you’re actually scraping right through the finish you know, eh?
No I’m not, look, it’s stuff that got on somehow and I’m just getting rid of it.
Well this went on for several weeks, and each day I’d go over the patch of raw, exposed particle board was bigger and bigger and bigger. Eventually he had succeeded in scraping the photo-finish covering from the entire desk top, gallery, and was partway up the one side and still he maintained he was just cleaning it. Now this was a man who, in his long lifetime, had helped raise seven children, built two houses, owned and managed a successful car dealership, and taught himself successful investing strategies for when he retired by the age of 50! And now he had just scraped almost entirely through an entire thickness of 5/8” particle board because he was trying to remove “a stain”.
But the really sad part was the one time that it actually sunk in and I was able to get across what he was doing, he just on the edge of the bed and asked
“…you mean I’m going the wrong way?”
“Yup, you’re making it worse, not better.”
There was a brief silence where it clicked, but then in a flash it was gone and he swore up and down again that he was just getting rid of some stuff thats on there.
As kids (their children) I think we often have as much trouble accepting the diminishment as they do. After all, these were (usually, anyway) our role models during our formative years, how can they not know what’s going on? Or better yet, we can’t figure out why they themselves can’t see how goofy they’re acting.
It’s a wild ride for sure, this aging process. Both for our own selves as well as watching others from the sidelines. It sounds like you’re in the right track though, and I hope you’re still able to make some changes for everyone’s benefit. Good luck.
