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My first job !
- Thread starter mmcmdl
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- Jun 7, 2013
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- Joined
- Apr 14, 2014
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Here's my assessment of the situation. Not from a parents point of view, but rather from someone who had a similar attitude about the same time in life, and observations of family members and friends going through similar situations with their kids.
It seems to be fairly typical of someone younger than 18. From 2 to 12 they want to follow and be part of everything their parents do. Around 12 to13 they start to get independent thinking they're all grown up and can make their own decisions. They have little or no concept as to how the money comes in to keep them clothed, fed, and puts those spending dollars in their pockets.. They think everyone has money, and all you need to do to get it is ask your parents for it.
About that time in their lives they think it's more important to hang out with their buddies and show off to the girls than be stuck getting their hands dirty with dad. You've asked him to give up his social life, which by the way lasts from the moment he wakes up in the morning to the time he hits the sack in the evening, to work for the same money that's been coming in on a regular basis with no effort on his part.
It was explained to me during those years that "You're going to have to work for a living when you grow up, so you might as well learn to do it at home". It wasn't all that painful once I understood the rules, and it certainly had it's rewards.
Keep in mind that about that time in a child's life both the parents and the child go through huge changes. The child suddenly knows (or think they know) all they need to know, and the parents suddenly become dumb as tree stumps. I thought it was an instant transfer of knowledge. How did my parents get this far in life being as dumb as they were. That phase could last several years or only a few minutes depending on the reaction of the parents.
In my case the phase was somewhat short lived. It only took a few weeks to comprehend I wasn't the source of the cash I was spending, and to keep that source flowing I had to make some changes. Begrudgingly I went along with the program, but knew deep down I was the smartest kid on the planet. It only took a few months before the tables started to turn. For some reason I'd lost a big part of all that knowledge I thought I had, and my parents suddenly emerged from being dumb as stumps. The older I got the dumber I got, and the smarter my parents became. In the end it all worked out.
It seems to be fairly typical of someone younger than 18. From 2 to 12 they want to follow and be part of everything their parents do. Around 12 to13 they start to get independent thinking they're all grown up and can make their own decisions. They have little or no concept as to how the money comes in to keep them clothed, fed, and puts those spending dollars in their pockets.. They think everyone has money, and all you need to do to get it is ask your parents for it.
About that time in their lives they think it's more important to hang out with their buddies and show off to the girls than be stuck getting their hands dirty with dad. You've asked him to give up his social life, which by the way lasts from the moment he wakes up in the morning to the time he hits the sack in the evening, to work for the same money that's been coming in on a regular basis with no effort on his part.
It was explained to me during those years that "You're going to have to work for a living when you grow up, so you might as well learn to do it at home". It wasn't all that painful once I understood the rules, and it certainly had it's rewards.
Keep in mind that about that time in a child's life both the parents and the child go through huge changes. The child suddenly knows (or think they know) all they need to know, and the parents suddenly become dumb as tree stumps. I thought it was an instant transfer of knowledge. How did my parents get this far in life being as dumb as they were. That phase could last several years or only a few minutes depending on the reaction of the parents.
In my case the phase was somewhat short lived. It only took a few weeks to comprehend I wasn't the source of the cash I was spending, and to keep that source flowing I had to make some changes. Begrudgingly I went along with the program, but knew deep down I was the smartest kid on the planet. It only took a few months before the tables started to turn. For some reason I'd lost a big part of all that knowledge I thought I had, and my parents suddenly emerged from being dumb as stumps. The older I got the dumber I got, and the smarter my parents became. In the end it all worked out.
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- Joined
- Jan 5, 2014
- Messages
- 944
Was easier for me I guess. Parents had no money. They kept us basically clothed and fed. If I wanted a new bike or whatever was important to me at the time I had to work. I mowed many lawns, cleaned a few barns, collected/raised/sold many night-crawlers (my first business!), shoveled way too many driveways and took a job helping a crochety (mean) old guy fixing small engines. I don't remember hating any of it (except for Mr. Crochety) but maybe that is the fog of age. At the time it just seemed to be expected behavior.
I have two nephews near in age. One is a real go-getter. The other is content with video games. Same parents. I guess you never know.
I have two nephews near in age. One is a real go-getter. The other is content with video games. Same parents. I guess you never know.
- Joined
- Oct 16, 2014
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- 314
If children are taught that sitting in front of TV or video games is acceptable conduct for the first dozen years of their life or more, it's a difficult transition to convince them that work is a lifelong obligation to obtain benefit.
If they're taught at a young age that gardening, household chores, and various duties all have a purpose and sometimes a payoff, then a transition to a paying endeavor for someone else is much easier, even natural.
They will understand that pulling out the Kubota is a good thing because, after all, they might otherwise have to do it by HAND.
But if that's never been shown, then yes, it'll be challenging starting with baby steps and requiring some extra effort on everyone's part.
If they're taught at a young age that gardening, household chores, and various duties all have a purpose and sometimes a payoff, then a transition to a paying endeavor for someone else is much easier, even natural.
They will understand that pulling out the Kubota is a good thing because, after all, they might otherwise have to do it by HAND.
But if that's never been shown, then yes, it'll be challenging starting with baby steps and requiring some extra effort on everyone's part.
- Joined
- Mar 26, 2018
- Messages
- 8,410
My wife would time our boys, one hour of Sony play station or tv. Your choice.
They hated it and cheated at every opportunity.
They grew up as very hard workers, they watched their parents go to work every day. We never called in sick unless we were sick.
Hang in there Dave,
Alls well that ends well.
They hated it and cheated at every opportunity.
They grew up as very hard workers, they watched their parents go to work every day. We never called in sick unless we were sick.
Hang in there Dave,
Alls well that ends well.
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2016
- Messages
- 11,475
On my way in to work ! I did pick up a job for the Kubota the other day . First real paying job , now I have to buy that stump grinder . I asked my son if he wanted to do the job , he wasn't interested . 