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2017 Archive
- Thread starter Frank Ford
- Start date
- Status
- Joined
- Jun 26, 2014
- Messages
- 619
Savarin, I had considered putting a link to some John Clarke stuff as a tribute - but not sure if he would actually be so 'internationally" funny. As a Kiwi (I just happen to have lived in Africa for the past 13 Years) I think his passing is a great loss.
- Joined
- Apr 12, 2011
- Messages
- 3,472
Researchers for the Massachusetts Turnpike Authority found over 200 dead crows near greater Boston recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu.
A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.
However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.
MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to Determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.
The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause:when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger.
They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Truck."
A Bird Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be vehicular impacts.
However, during the detailed analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was determined that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by an impact with a car.
MTA then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to Determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.
The Ornithological Behaviorist very quickly concluded the cause:when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow in a nearby tree to warn of impending danger.
They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah", not a single one could shout "Truck."
- Joined
- Aug 22, 2012
- Messages
- 4,115
I think your correct Pete, I love his political skits with Bryan Dawe but I recall some comments on one of their youtube clips where the respondents thought they were real news readers and interviewers and it was Australian news reporting.
That made me laugh harder.
He will be greatly missed.
- Joined
- Aug 22, 2012
- Messages
- 4,115
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer.
‘This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it you.’
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, ‘Which do you want, son?’
The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
‘What did I tell you?’ said the barber. ‘That kid never learns!’
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.
‘Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?’
The boy licked his cone and replied,
‘Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!’
‘This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it you.’
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, ‘Which do you want, son?’
The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
‘What did I tell you?’ said the barber. ‘That kid never learns!’
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.
‘Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?’
The boy licked his cone and replied,
‘Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!’
- Joined
- Aug 22, 2012
- Messages
- 4,115
Why do you think the telescope is taking so long?
- Joined
- Apr 12, 2011
- Messages
- 3,472
- Status