- Joined
- Jan 20, 2018
- Messages
- 5,645
I'm sure many of you think that I must be posting this from my hospital bed. On the contrary, I'm alive and well.
When I was a boy, my father gave my mother an electric edger for Mother's Day. This was before string-trimmers were invented. The device in question had a 4 inch metal blade which spun at several thousand rpm. From my mother's reaction, I fully expected to have to testify at her trial, with that "infernal machine" featured as "exhibit A" aka "the murder weapon". This episode was has influenced me throughout my life.
My first wife (GRHS) was of a similar mind, devices of domestic drudgery were not acceptable gifts on any occasion. PERIOD! Approach that line at your own peril. A friend's wife recently summed it up quite nicely, "don't get me anything with a handle". Best to stick with something safe, jewelry is always a good bet.
Fast forward to this Christmas. Among my many gifts were two particularly appropriate tee shirts.
The first, because I am an avid firewood hoarder and chainsaw aficionado.
The second requires no explanation here.
But I digress.
I gave my wife a vacuum for Christmas. In my defense, she asked for it. I don't mean that she did something awful and this was my revenge. She literally asked for a new vacuum. Our old one is not that old and is perfectly serviceable, but she wanted a newer, lighter one. She wanted a Shark. So, contrary to all the lessons I had learned in the preceding 60+ years, I got her one. She was so excited that she had me assemble it before dessert. The children were scarcely out the door before she was happily vacuuming the entire first floor, all the while marveling at how light and maneuverable it was and how much crap it was picking up despite having vacuumed earlier in the day.
In closing, let me say that my wife is definitely a keeper. I just hope she feels that way about me.
Merry Christmas and Happy Chanukkah to all of you.
When I was a boy, my father gave my mother an electric edger for Mother's Day. This was before string-trimmers were invented. The device in question had a 4 inch metal blade which spun at several thousand rpm. From my mother's reaction, I fully expected to have to testify at her trial, with that "infernal machine" featured as "exhibit A" aka "the murder weapon". This episode was has influenced me throughout my life.
My first wife (GRHS) was of a similar mind, devices of domestic drudgery were not acceptable gifts on any occasion. PERIOD! Approach that line at your own peril. A friend's wife recently summed it up quite nicely, "don't get me anything with a handle". Best to stick with something safe, jewelry is always a good bet.
Fast forward to this Christmas. Among my many gifts were two particularly appropriate tee shirts.
The first, because I am an avid firewood hoarder and chainsaw aficionado.
The second requires no explanation here.
But I digress.
I gave my wife a vacuum for Christmas. In my defense, she asked for it. I don't mean that she did something awful and this was my revenge. She literally asked for a new vacuum. Our old one is not that old and is perfectly serviceable, but she wanted a newer, lighter one. She wanted a Shark. So, contrary to all the lessons I had learned in the preceding 60+ years, I got her one. She was so excited that she had me assemble it before dessert. The children were scarcely out the door before she was happily vacuuming the entire first floor, all the while marveling at how light and maneuverable it was and how much crap it was picking up despite having vacuumed earlier in the day.
In closing, let me say that my wife is definitely a keeper. I just hope she feels that way about me.
Merry Christmas and Happy Chanukkah to all of you.
