Doing Jobs for "Friends"

My favourites are the ones who tell you they want a "Simple Part" made, and when confronted with the time and number of operations to make it counter with "[Insert Equipment Manufacturer Here] sell them for a fiver", the conversation then usually progresses along the following lines

Me "Well buy one from them, it'll take me ages and multiple set-ups to make that"
Them "I can't, they don't have them any more and tell me they're obsolete"
Me "You can still get them made for a fiver"
Them "How?"
Me "Same way [Insert Equipment Manufacturer Here] did"
Them "How is that"
Me "Pay for the production line to be set up and run for a minimum of 100000 units and you'll get them for a fiver each"

If the penny doesn't drop at that point run away, they're too busy concentrating on breathing in and breathing out in the right order!

People who don't make things, don't know how they are made and who aren't naturally deep thinkers will automatically assume that anything they cannot currently do "Can't be that hard", I find that another useful phrase for the toolbox when asked to make a Simple Part is "Since it's simple tell me exactly how you would make it."
 
I have not done too many projects for friends. The ones I have done are for people I would help just because they are who they are. The truth is most don't know I have a machine shop in the shed. If they do know they don't understand what a machine shop is.

There have been one or two who after I agree to do the job for them actually said don't bother when they realize the time it will take or materials involved (which I would have provided). They actually don't want to cause me the trouble and waste my time, not realizing this is a hobby I enjoy doing...especially when I feel like I'm helping someone.

So I've not had a negative experience.
 
I must be living in a parallel universe. I have never done work for friends that they didn't expect to pay. Most of the time I don't accept the money. Some jobs are easy, some complicated. Maybe that's some don't have friends, they don't treat them as friends.


"Billy G"
 
I think that sometimes people tend to overcomplicate what a true friend really is. If you're being totally honest with yourself, you really have very few. To simplify things, if you are approached with a proposal to do a job, and you even have to stop for a second to consider doing it or not, that isn't a friend. The "back and forth" between "real" friends is automatic and unconditional.
 
Asm109 said:
A friend recently asked if I could repair the foot on the tongue jack of his boat trailer.
I said sure. He said how much. I said I like single malt scotch.
When he picked the jack up, he brought me a really nice bottle of single malt. Better than I buy for myself.
You can never have too many friends like that.
Click to expand...

Now that's a pretty good friend. :D
 
I'm sure we all agree that it feels good to help those who ask for it but it equally feels horrible when you find out you've been taken advantage of.

I always hope the people who ask for my help have enough common sense to know where the limits are and do not rely on me to let them know they have crossed the line and have now become an opportunistic pain in the rear end, but unfortunately some view your willingness to help as a sign that says "hey come on in and take as much as you want, I'm a chump and I won't complain" type of thing.

My latest case is the neighbor that I have had for the past 5 years, At first he seemed like a stand up guy when I first move in the new neighbourhood , he has a cottage next to my house that is in a constant need of small repairs, the first 3 years I never stopped helping him with the repairs and even used my own material/parts(as well as my time) for the fixes, he offered to cook a few steaks and ribs for me to return the favors but I'm not a big meat eater and kept saying no to those offers.

This continued until recently when I noticed he actually looks for new projects not only around his own house but also his relatives/friends/coworkers house ,to bring to the cottage to keep himself ( and of course me) busy, the way he viewed it in his own word " to have a positive and productive weekend at the cottage" so it is needless to say I felt so abused like I had a big SUCKER written on my forehead, to him the there was no limit in my help and I hated the fact that I had to be the one to put a stop to all that.

I know one thing though, he'll never severe this relationship with me because he's that type of person who thinks if he stops talking to me he'll never get anything out of me so nowadays he does not ask for big repairs anymore but stay civil for smaller favors like if he could park his car on my freshly plowed front yard in winter or have access to my water well in summer.I'm just glad he finally got the message.

I don't want to sound like I have a big heart and kindness oozes out of me but I never stopped giving a hand to others in the neighborhood if/ when they asked just because of the bad experience I had with the man next door but now I am a bit more cautious on how I offer my help , I give a little and wait for their reaction before I offer more.
 
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